lesbianvenom:

#emmy nominated television

(Source: jennifer-lawrenses, via missmariclaire)

the-time-goddess-of-221b:

pandaofmanyfandoms:

I CANT BREATHE

This whole movie was one giant pun

(Source: tumboy, via missmariclaire)

My boyfriend is a puppy.

chescaleigh:

upworthy:

A Really Easy Chart To Help Americans Understand One Particular ‘Fashion’ Statement

Halloween is right around the corner folks…

jurgbury:

sizvideos:

Video

YEEESSSS 

What if you’re bi. Crap. 

(via missmariclaire)

420calum:

So at work yesterday we only had pink spoons to hand out for the frozen yogurt and every male asked if we had a different color spoon because they did not like pink and it’s femininity and lemme tell u that this proves boys are weak and a fuckjng pink spoon proved that

(via slingsandarrowsfromthedumpster)

(Source: iraffiruse, via emzybrain)

danglingthpider:

notcrazyiswear:

I’ve put together a simple chart that explains the various ways you should and shouldn’t summon a waiter over to your table, and the service you’re likely to receive accordingly.

Because if one more middle aged, obnoxious asshole goes “hey you!” and snaps their fingers at me, I WILL snap said person’s neck.

I waitressed my way through college and one night this guy yells at me “Oi! you with the tits!” and my co-worker Matthew walked up to him and said “yes?”

(via skitsophrenia-mania)

Lies I’ve Told My 3 Year Old Recently

Trees talk to each other at night.
All fish are named either Lorna or Jack.
Before your eyeballs fall out from watching too much TV, they get very loose.
Tiny bears live in drain pipes.
If you are very, very quiet you can hear the clouds rub against the sky.
The moon and the sun had a fight a long time ago.
Everyone knows at least one secret language.
When nobody is looking, I can fly.
We are all held together by invisible threads.
Books get lonely too.
Sadness can be eaten.
I will always be there.

Raul Gutierrez, “Lies I’ve Told My 3 Year Old Recently” (via cierrafrances)

(Source: words-in-lines, via missmariclaire)